HOROSCOPES
Aries (March 21- April 19)
You will hit a brick wall. Ouch!
Taurus (April 20 - May 20)
Show your "bull" side with a nose ring. It looks cool and your parents will be able to lead you anywhere they want.
Gemini (May 21 - June 21)
You see double of everything. After bumping into a wall a number of times you will get your eyes checked.
Cancer (June 22 - July 22)
Dearest "Crabby Person" keep your legs away from boiling water and butter. Lemon is your best scent.
Leo (July 23 - Aug. 22)
Get a hair cut..... Get a job..... Get a life.
Virgo (Aug. 23 - Sept. 23)
You will meet interesting people and they will rip you off. Choose your friends more carefully.
Libra (Sept. 23 - Oct. 23)
Don't believe everything you hear..... or read.
Scorpio (Oct.24 - Nov. 21)
Scorpio is a scorpion. Make sure you don't sting anybody even if they deserve it.
Sagittarius (Nov. 22 - Dec. 21)
Your love life sucks this month. Next month doesn't look goof either. Can you say loner?
Capricorn (Dec. 22 - Jan. 19)
Clothing is not food. Wash your feet, shave and brush you teeth.
Aquarius (Jan. 20 - Feb. 18)
You were a hippie in another life. That means you are kinda flaky. Wear tie dye and beads in your hair. Peace Man.
Pisces ( Feb 19 - March 20)
You are a fish. Be sure to stay near water this month or you'll dry up.